vipassana – take four
Recipe for success
When you need to get things moving, and find some relief in the process.
Lemon peels aversion of juicy fear, washing illusions away
Gingerly facing the doubt, soothes the guilt of responsibility
Watering the dehydrated cravings, dissolves the stagnant regrets
Honeyed drowsiness of self loathing sweetens in forgiveness of self
Cayenne Pepper’s biting agitation forces disgust for old ways
Lately I’ve been slightly obsessed with the Mox-E-Lixir from Moxie Bread Co. It’s not a new elixir, in fact I’ve encountered it in a variety of forms over the years as it’s often considered or recommended for detox and generally seen as a metabolic and digestion aid. As in Ayurvedic Medicine where yogi’s start their morning with warm water and lemon, which I subscribed to for years, but broke the habit of a while back. Then there’s the infinite selections of lemon ginger tea which was reliably found on any coffee shop menu in Australia and New Zealand, my chosen alternative to coffee. Or, there’s the Hot Toddy, which reminds me of being in Ireland on a couple of occasions of rainy afternoons spent in peat-fire-warmed pubs with different friends– back when I drank alcohol. And just the other day, down the street, I had a warm “golden elixir” in north Boulder that I swear was made from lemon ginger marmalade and hot water, though that’s not with the description on the menu says. The thing about Moxie is, they also offer theirs iced, and should you be adventurous enough, with sparkling water–10/10 would recommend! During these hot summer days, it’s a delicious kick start to the mornings where I find myself deep in continued metabolization of self-awareness and the evolution of consciousness post-Vipassana.
Lately I’ve also been sharing more openly about my chronic constipation, and I was so elated when Lllama Rod Owens referenced being energetically and spiritually constipated in his New Saints Book. Once you know what complete havoc trauma wreaks on the body, mind, and spirit, it’s a holy shit!–sort of moment. On Vipassana retreat you eat a very modest diet. For new students there was a breakfast of oatmeal, stewed fruit, fresh fruit, museli, yogurt, toast, jams and spreads like butter and vegemite, tea, and hot chocolate. For lunch, usually raw veggies like a salad as well as cooked veggies, a grain or legume based entree, or soup/stew, a desert of sorts, and tea. For dinner you could have two pieces of fruit like banana, apple, orange, pear. Meals, as with everything, were eaten in silence, facing away from each other (toward the wall). This internal focus and simplicity evoked mindful eating, and intended to keep digestion easy, and gaseousness to a minimum, given the numerous hours in close proximity to each other in the meditation hall and the dormitories.
Vipassana is a powerful way to devote some time to digesting and metabolizing any clogged or backed up mental/emotional/physical sludge that’s holding your solar plexus chakra hostage. This third chakra sits just about at the belly button and just below the rib cage, it holds up the heart chakra and when clear and flowing it infuses the creative life force energy of the root and sacral chakras with the confidence to hold boundaries around self-identified beliefs/knowings/truths, that are then pumped up to the heart center to be energetically expressed and infused further. This area of the body, where the gallbladder, the digestive tract, the liver & kidneys, and many of our filtering organs sit is vital to fully expressing the healthiest, fullest version of ourself. And it can become bogged down, compacted, fatigued, wounded in the process of sorting the thoughts, beliefs, ideas of others that we encounter on a personal, communal, and collective systemic levels. A thorough cleansing offers the opportunity to be more in touch with our individual truth, those well suppressed needs/wants/desires, and shows us where we are out of alignment in our actions according to our personal values.
Intellectually one may understand that the material aggregate, the body, is not 'I', not 'mine', but merely an impersonal, changing phenomenon which is beyond one's control; actually, however, one identifies with the body, and develops tremendous attachment to it. - S. N. GOENKA
Vipassana is drano that drops you into new depths of awareness of subtle and gross sensation through heightened senses, by simultaneously removing them in their known form and intentionally focusing on the awareness of them internally. It teaches that the attachment to stories we tell about our “ourselves” are inaccurate projections of the mind that become a danger to our perception of happiness. Which is to say, in Vipassana, you go into the energetic psychosomatic body to roto-rooter the buildup that has latent affects the physical body (What My Bones Know). You’re taught to cultivate a separation that allows for witnessing to emerge, and therefore clarity. And with that wisdom new or healthier attachments of interdependence rather than co-dependence can be established.
The unique element in his [Buddha] teaching lies elsewhere, in his identifying physical sensation as the crucial point at which craving and aversion begin, and at which they must be eliminated. Unless one deals with sensations, one will be working only at a superficial level of the mind, while in the depths the old habit of reaction will continue. By learning to be aware of all the sensations within oneself and to remain equanimous towards them, one stops reactions where they start: one comes out of misery. - S. N. GOENKA
There are infinite recipes for cleanses, but certainly the medicinal quality of Vipassana stands to offer a kick start and relief in the healing process. The shadow side to the solar plexus is shame. Shame is the lowest vibration and expression of consciousness on the enlightenment scale. To live in and through and from shame is the ultimate dimming of the essence of one’s life-force energy. The obstacle to healing shame, creating less Sankara’s as Goenka says in Vipassana, requires a transcendence through fear into love. In fear there is aversion to the truth, which can only be pacified and transformed when met with the present. Being present means non-attachment to the past and non-projection into the future.
The past, where the stories of what and who and when and why things happened to us/through us/by us are hooks, that keep us frozen and reacting from that moment in
time when the transgression occurred. The future, where the stories of the visions for what and who and when and why things are going to look a certain way are hooks, that keep us away from the current moment, reality. Here in the now, action must be taken to achieve the vision, the the hooks hang with guilt of the truth that we have very limited control and yet a significant amount of responsibility. To transcend the guilt demands that we let go, or surrender to what is and act in alignment with the desired change which often means identifying and choosing a different action then historically has been.
This acknowledgment that the only action that can be taken to effect change is a new one, without guaranteed results, can cause doubt. And yet the doubt can also be soothing as it allows for the possibility of alternative solutions previously unknown and outcomes that exceed expectations. In the pause of the doubt, that spaciousness of option becomes the beginning of the transcendence out of fear, because this glimpse of potential and any excitement around it, is hope. Hope that things can be and will be different. And, it’s acceptance of the cravings for things to have been and to be different, and the regrets that the past cannot be changed, but the future can be. So we allow for the choices we make in this moment to not be regretful, but instead purposeful and inspired.
Which can be sticky as there may be self-loathing about what identities we took on to accommodate for what happened, and despair for knowing that we desperately wish for change, but must let those identities go in order to make new and different choices, that sometimes feel insurmountable. It requires radical self-forgiveness of the past version of ourselves and in the current moment when choosing the new alternative with no guarantee for what the true results will be. This is the moment where there is a cultivation of faith, for oneself, for the unseen and unknown, and in the process of creation. With strong faith and devotion to change, the invitation to move through the agitation of being dissatisfied with the self and to move toward radical self-acceptance, love, peace, and equanimity, some might call it enlightenment. This continual evolution to working away from the misery of shame is the path of the spiritual warrior.
If one is ignorant, one gives valuations and reacts to the sensations, generating new misery for oneself. But if wisdom arises, one simply understands that subatomic particles are arising with a predominance of one or another element, and that these are all impersonal, changing phenomena, arising to pass away. - S. N. GOENKA
Spiritual warriors live as much as possible in the now. It’s a devotion to healthy detachment and an openness to the unseen and unknown that cannot be controlled, and is in reverence for the sacredness of that awkwardness and discomfort of the individual experience within the collective. It evokes a quality of lightness that allows for life to move to and through and on to it’s next form. I’ve noticed that historically I tended to wear life like a lead vest, a piece of armor in effort of protecting my soft-hearted warrior self. Unfortunately, it’s heavy, and despite being constantly worried about the exposure to the radiation of the projection of others & societies thoughts, beliefs– fears, I have not only absorbed and take on these fears anyway, but I have also limited my ability to radiate the true brilliance and beauty of my own light. And instead forced it to filter through the vestibule of fear, and contributed to the constriction of expression of the multidimensionality that is the opulence and opportunity of being a human in this time, place, and space. It is therefore my practice to continue to choose to sit and cultivate the space necessary to clear the blockages, see myself clearly,
setup healthy boundaries, drop the arms and take a shot to allow that I/it/we can be healed. A place/space/time where radical self-forgiveness, self-love, and imperfection can exist and be expressed without regret, with an effort to minimize harm. In doing so, I am often surprised and inspired by what I find, this overwhelming abundance of forms that life energy takes on. And I continue give myself permission to play a little more, so that I can dress myself more lightly allowing for a better, consistent flow.
If you’re energetically and emotionally constipated, there are meditation centers worldwide.
Dhamma Ujala in Clare, Australia
Vipassana Centers World
Comments